Sonic, The fastest porcupine in the world has been the protagonist of many games that have made history. With more than 150 titles released between the main series and spin-offs, it has become an icon of the videogame world ...
... But even our heroes have some moments to forget
Before the arrival of Sony and Microsoft in the gaming market, there were two other giants competing for what was the console market: Nintendo and SEGA. At the beginning of the 90s, the console war between SNES and SEGA Mega Drive was going crazy and for the small videogame house SEGA there was a need for something that could face the most powerful weapon of Nintendo, Super Mario. Here then comes in 1991 "Sonic The Hedgehog", the first video game of the successful series that tells of the adventures of Sonic, a Blue hedgehog that moves at the speed of sound.
Unfortunately for SEGA, this it wasn't enough to counter the power of Nintendo and we all know how it ended, despite this the fastest hedgehog in the world has been the protagonist of many games that have made history. With more than 150 titles released between the main series and spin-offs, it has become an icon of the videogame world ...
But even our heroes have some moments to forget ...
So here I am to tell you about some of the most embarrassing moments of Sonic's life, because, let's face it, not even running at the speed of sound would be able to escape from these situations!
1) Code name: Mr. Porcupine
Let's start with something light. The design of Sonic is inspired by two famous characters, it is in fact the cross between two icons of the world of animation Felix the cat e Mickey mouse. His curvilinear shapes contrasted with the dry lines of the "hair" made Sonic a character as simple as it is captivating.
Sonic's design is inspired by Mickey and Felix the Cat
But before Sonic got his design today, he had to go through multiple stages. Among the proposed designs were an armadillo, a dog resembling Theodore Roosvelt in pajamas and finally a hare. The latter was initially chosen to create a character who would later use hers ears for grabbing and throwing objects. Fortunately, the idea was shelved as the mechanic would have broken the rhythm of the game (it was later reworked and adapted for the Ristar game).
Sonic was supposed to be a hare that grabbed and threw objects with his ears
The design wasn't the only noteworthy thing about Sonic's creation, in fact both the character and the video game had nice coded names. In fact, during development Sonic was called "Mr. Needlemouse " while the game project was "Defeat Mario". Unfortunately, the hoped-for result was not achieved.
2) What is this, a crossover episode?
There are Sonic, Eggman, the Imperial fleet, Goku and a werewolf: I know, it sounds like the beginning of a bad joke, but sadly, it is much worse.
What I have just described to you is only the opening of "Sonic Unleashed" 2008 video game in which Sonic finds himself having to stop the evil Eggman's plan by trying to balance his human form with the animal one, or something like that since Sonic is already an animal.
Watching the opening of the game, I found myself in front of something absurd, this is more or less what happens.
Everything starts in space, initially I thought I had the wrong video, check ... ok it's not Star Wars, let's continue. An imperial fleet is approaching, I still have some doubts but I proceed. Here is Eggman finally, you almost banished me, he is advancing towards the earth, the alarm goes off ... "Sonic!" Ok I'm watching the video right then. Sonic fights against Eggman's robots and defeats them easily, but he is trapped but uses the dragon balls and transforms into Super Saiyan, Freeza, er ... I mean ... Eggman, runs away, but Sonic reaches him and in the meantime destroys everything the enemy fleet, arrives in front of the scientist and as in the most classic clichés, Doofenshmirtz captures Perry the platypus, no wait it's still Eggman and Sonic! Okay, a beam is fired at the earth and Ultima Weapon awakens, or something like that… I think. Meanwhile Eggman I guess is trying to kill Sonic ... What the hell ?! Ok, I didn't understand, instead of killing his nemesis he turns him into a "Hedgehog that he was" (-cit Futurama).
I only have one thing to say, "Wow, what is this, a crossover episode?"
3) Nobody thinks about children ?!
I'm sure all of you are convinced that the Sonic series is a children's series, right? We are talking about a blue hedgehog running at sonic speed, what could be unsuitable?
To learn more:
Sex and Video Games - Taboo of a Medium (not) in the Vanguard [NSFW]
Well we'll talk about it later, but in the meantime, if you have a Japanese version of Sonic Adventure from 1998, I invite you to play at the Casinopolis stage. As you can see, inside the level there is one of those classic mechanical billboards, a lighted sign with a Cowgirl holding a glass in his hand. Approaching and jumping near the sign you will have the pleasure of hearing the girl's moans of pleasure ... ah Japan, you did it again!
4) Advertising Regresso
There are several ways to advertise a product and in my life I have seen a lot of horrible advertisements, but I think I have never seen worse use of a mascot costume. I mean, what the hell is he doing?
Oh Sonic! Can't you stay 5 seconds without humiliating yourself?
Even the actor inside the costume has slowly realized this, look in fact as from photo to photo his enthusiasm sinks more and more.
In the first photo Sonic shows up with a nice sign of victory
Peace!
Here, however, already from the next one begins to lose hits, observe how the right hand is left dangling to the side
Peace again ...
Now the sign of victory, becomes a finger?
One peace?
And we conclude with a Sonic whose pride has now completely disappeared. Not even the strength to raise an arm.
I Quit
Sonic, what happened to you? Once you were cool!
5) You are Somari
Here, do you remember how we used to talk about the war between Super Mario and Sonic? And how the latter was created to counter the Nintendo icon? Well, luckily Mario and Sonic have finally made peace, and here is the first crossover game between the two, maybe let's talk about "Mario & Sonic at the Olympic games ? " AH! AH! AH! NO!
Before Nintendo and Sega even started to collaborate, a far more ambitious project was developed.
"Somari", 1994 video game, distributed on NES and marketed in Russia and some Asian countries. The protagonist of the cartridge is the homonymous Somari, a plumber who wears special shoes that allow him to run very fast and whose purpose is to collect golden rings while defeating the enemies he encounters on his way… does that sound familiar? Well I think so since it is a port of the first Sonic The Hedgehog in which the protagonist has been replaced by a fusion between SOnic and MARIo, precisely SOMARI.
A rare gem that every true player cannot fail to know! In addition, for us the name of the game takes on an even more interesting meaning.
6) A question of language
Well since we are talking about names, we cannot fail to mention a Sonic video game with a certainly singular title. Also in this case our language comes to our aid, if for other countries this name may seem like a simple play on words, for us it can take on a completely different meaning.
What am I talking about?
1993 game, developed for arcades, tells of the adventures of Sonic, Ray and Mighty, three friends who are taken prisoner by Dr. Eggman on an island and must find a way to escape. Game title? SEGASONIC The Hedgehog, Also known as SEGASONIC Arcade. And nothing, I would say that it is already embarrassing without adding anything else!
What am I supposed to do in this game?
7) Sonic Interference
During the 2016 San Diego Comic-Con, Sega was preparing to celebrate the 25th anniversary of its iconic mascot. A big party was set up, during which fans also had the chance to try out the new title Sonic Mania. It was a great event for all who managed to participate. Too bad, however, that this historic event is not remembered for the party itself but only for the live streaming made for the occasion. In fact, to give fans back home the chance to celebrate Sonic's anniversary, Sega hosted a live stream of the entire event. An audio problem, however, accompanied the entire direct e a high-pitched, annoying sound was audible for the duration of the stream.
Luckily SEGA is equipped with self-humor and in Sonic Mania a small cameo of audio interference has been inserted (we can also see how the numbers 072216, Sonic Mania announcement date and the date of the unfortunate 25 are shown in the tv present in the game. Sonic's anniversary).
if you listen very closely you can hear the fucking buzzing from the sonic 25th anniversary stream. oh my god. pic.twitter.com/kcF4wgzNbD
- diddy (@UnknownKongYT) August 15, 2017
8) The fall of the hero
In the world of video games, and beyond, Sonic has set several world records. For example, it entered the Guinness World Record Videogame Edition as the best-selling game for Sega System, for the compilation of Retro Game that has sold the most and as a comic based on a longer-lived video game.
Few people know, however, that Sonic was the first video game character to earn a giant balloon at a parade. In 1993 at the Macy's thanksgiving day parade, Sonic took part in the event, but unfortunately his huge balloon hit an electric pole and burst out. As if that wasn't enough, the huge Hedgehog fell on an off-duty policeman hurting him. Definitely a day to forget for our hero.
9) Embarrassing speed
As already mentioned above, the peculiar characteristic of the blue porcupine is its incredible speed. Sonic in fact manages to reach the speed of sound, this feature was originally chosen during the aforementioned console war between Nintendo and Sega. The Sega home console in fact had greater hardware power and the incredible speed of Sonic, as opposed to the "slowness" of Super Mario, was used to underline the different performance of the two consoles.
Why this premise? Because as the 9th point of this article we find Sonic Labyrinth, a puzzle game of the Sonic series originally released for Game Gear, now converted for virtual console for Nintendo 3DS and present as a mini game within Sonic Adventure DX and Sonic Mega Collection Plus.
What is special about this game?
Sonic is SLOW!
How can it be? you say, but that's it: throughout the game we will find ourselves moving Sonic inside a fake 3D world in which Sonic will move to a speed to say the least embarrassing. The only way to increase the speed of our hero is the Dash, the only action present in the game and which allows our hero to roll towards the selected direction. The more the button is pressed, the faster the roll will be. The action, however, is very uncomfortable and certainly not suitable for constantly moving around the playing field, especially if we consider the fact that Sonic, while rolling, is not maneuverable. In short, every historical saga has had its ups and downs, but a slow Sonic just can't be seen, I hope someone was fired for it.
10) The kiss of true love
Okay, we've seen 9 more or less awkward Sonic moments. Surely our blue hedgehog did not expect to find himself in all these absurd situations during his life, but the one we are about to see now I think far exceeds all expectations. 2006 Sonic the Hedgehog, a video game released first for XBOX 360 and then for Playstation 3, was to mark a return to origins for the Sega mascot and a renewal of the entire saga.
In the land of Soleanna, the protagonist and Tails find themselves defending Princess Elise (a human) from Doctor Eggman who attempts to kidnap her. Meanwhile Shadow and his colleague Rouge awaken the evil spirit Mephiles who transports our heroes to a post-apocalyptic future where a demon, Iblis, has ravaged the world.
Sonic 2006 is considered by many one of the worst games in the saga, but it's not so much the game itself that has caught my attention, as much as the final scene, which earned him a rightful place in this article.
Attention, from here on I will freely talk about fundamental parts of the plot of this game, if you don't want to Spoiler you are invited to stop, play Sonic 2006 and return to read the article, if you want to know why this game is part of this ranking, read on. Live or die? Make your choice.During the story, our heroes will find themselves collecting the 7 emeralds of chaos that allow Sonic to transform into Super Sonic, in order to give him the power to defeat the enemy. During the search Sonic will be shot dead by Mephiles and will be the end for our hero. Mephiles will use the power of the emeralds to merge with Iblis to become Solaris. Definitely a courageous choice to have the protagonist of the game die, as well as the mascot of the Sega house, but it is what happens later that upsets everything. Silver tells how it is possible to bring Sonic back to life using the powers of the emeralds, the group splits up and with the help of Dr. Eggman they manage to locate and collect all the emeralds. They begin the ritual to bring Sonic back to life, Princess Elise with a kiss brings back to life our hero who by sharing the power of the emeralds with Shadow and Silver manages to defeat Solaris.
But, wait a second… Did Princess Elise really kiss Sonic's dead body? But above all… Elise is a human !? Is Sonic a Porcupine ?! SEGA what the heck are you doing?
Okay everything, I can suspend disbelief and whatever you want, but there is something totally wrong with this scene. Heck, it's a kid's game! I don't even want to imagine the conversation they decided to shoot this scene with.
How about if at the end of the game we make a girl kiss a corpse of a hedgehog to bring it back to life? Good idea!
Embarrassing is an understatement, I think I won't sleep the night after what I saw.
However one thing there is to say, they had the courage to do what Twilight failed, to combine Zoophilia and Necrophilia in one scene. Well Done SEGA, Well Done!
Bonus
